Score: 3

"sigh."

submission: Biosock

date: December 5, 2007

I try very hard these days NOT to write bad reviews on things, but I feel I really have to in this instance, seeing as I love Bioshock and all the reviews on this are so hilariously overscored due to fanboys.

First, it's great that you played Bioshock. It's bad that you made this parody. It's also bad that alot of the graphics in this are traced. Every bioshock flash made since the game was released have all traced the same Big Daddy concept art that is readily available on the game's official site.

I cant understand WHY people trace these. It doesnt make the drawings any more realistic. And honestly, I'd much rather see someone's own art style forming an interpretation of a Big Daddy instead of the same bland traced flash drawings used in every Bioshock flash ever.
So I'm just going to assume you have no artistic integrity as your Big Daddy accused. I guess you cant animate either as all the characters were bad pencil-tool drawings whose 2-3 body parts were paintfully tweened around with motion tweens. Hardly animation and painful to look at.
The backrounds were traced bitmaps.

You also forgot to tell any jokes in this. But I'm quite certain this wasnt meant to be a comedy because nothing funny happened in it. Just characters gabbling stuff at each other.
Pointing out the obvious isnt funny. "you're supposed to be looking for a little sister" Oh I GET IT! He's not doing his job. What an absolute barrel of laughs. :/
Oh and you stuck the Charlie the Unicorn characters in this. Oh that's trendy. As opposed to poking fun at the situations in the game, instead you referenced a popular flash in order to get something people recognized into the cartoon to ensure they would vote 5. Well how very clever. You ripped the Unicorns straight from the flash, too. Didnt even bother to trace them.

Too much work I guess, to draw simple a unicorn.

Ironically, the chap who made "Charlie the Unicorn" and "The Last Unicorn" and "Spatula Madness" was once part of a group devoted to making good animated original films. I'm sure he'd be very proud to see his characters in this thing that represents all thats wrong with parodies these days.

Oh Atlus rapes the Little Sister. Man, you sure are edgy. EDGY IN YOUR FACE TO THE X-TREME.

Also, you may or may not have any friends, but its never a good idea to do all the voices yourself. Especially if you can only do one voice. Each character sounded the same. Like a bad Cheech Marin impression. Had the dead raped little sister spoke, I'm sure she'd have sounded just like everyone else.
Actually, that would have made this funny.

Wasted potential really. I would have given this a zero but then that abused M-Bot thing would delete this review.

Either way, if you decide to try something like this in the future, don't. Just don't.
And now, to return to writing good reviews for good cartoons again.

Score: 10

"wahaha"

submission: DailyDay4:CoolDr GitsSum

date: December 1, 2007

best dailyday submission by far.

you win a golden fff

Score: 10

"lovely."

submission: Dry Stone Walling

date: November 29, 2007

Never seen a flash cartoon done in this sort of art style.

It was very refreshing.

The cartoon was also really sad and well done, too. Nice nicey nice.

Score: 10

"dude."

submission: Assortment of Magic

date: November 29, 2007

I usually expect good things from you, regardless, but oh man.
This was really wonderful.

It made my intestines happy in many ways.
Onto mah favorites it goes.

Score: 8

"good"

submission: The Flathead Collab

date: November 24, 2007

The first 4-5 sections of this were mind-numbingly bad. I nearly cried. :C

However the rest was so fun and made up for it quite easily.

I downloaded the soundtrack to Mouse Hunt

woop woop

Score: 3

"Oh boy."

submission: The Hobbit - Act I

date: November 21, 2007

You know it'd be nice if the fanboys would stop accusing every person who gives this flash constructive criticism as being "jealous"
That's childish stupid logic and only fuels the flames of denial that bloat this website like a hairy butt tick.

There comes a time for every artist (and their fans) to sit back and look upon their work with a critical eye. For some, it's easy, because they don't enjoy looking at their own work, regardless.
For others, it's difficult, because to them, their work is perfect. And if the cartoon were made purely to entertain the author himself or herself, that'd be fine.

But these cartoons aren't MEANT simply to entertain the author. They are made specifically to cater to the 'audience' here. And when that audience realizes that the entertainer in question is no longer putting his or her heart into their work, then its the PEOPLE'S DUTY to point this out in the hopes that the entertainer will attempt to improve his or her craft. To show some effort. For once.

That's what the trouble here is. The craft has remained the same for nearly 7 years now. And not by design choice, but from not wanting to. Which is fine. If one wants to keep doing the same thing over and over and over ad-nauseum, that's ok. Just dont expect everyone to think the same and go along with it like little ants walking into a nest.

The real trouble here is that, while the author has not attempted to improve his skill by much, or any, he at least makes the effort with each one of his films, to at least try to improve the character models that he tweens lazily in every direction.
But not this time.
The characters this time around are the same line tool drawings that were used in the previous episode of this "series"
So, the only true effort done here was the tweening. Haha. sigh :(

So, no points for the art. Either you're lazy or stuck in a slump. Seeing how long you've been making these, most will assume the former. It'd only take you seconds to edit the symbols and make the characters look nicer. Maybe actually shading them as opposed to just using lots o' gradients. Ah well.

Once again, the humor here was very....not humorous. Equating to a fanfic of Invader Zim where the characters holler some obscure reference or object every few seconds in an effort to be "lolz random penguin bacon random lol"
It's cute at first, but considering this is like the 50th cartoon you've done with these characters, it'd be nice to see something CHANGE. You have an imagination. Why not use it? Why not make something that is funny and not just random? There's a big difference between being corny (like Jay Leno) and being wincingly dumb.

The music was nice, but you didn't make it, so blah.

I still forward your best flash was the Return of Ganondorf. Due mostly to the fact that it ran on CHARACTER humor and not characters shreiking dumb things at each other. You havent improved your animation a single bit since then, but you've clearly stopped giving too much of a crap.

Signed,
From a former fan, still waiting for you to do something unexpected and unique. Which will never happen at this point.

Score: 10

"Don't change a thing."

submission: A Wizard Creates

date: November 20, 2007

It's perfect. The people who are bitching that its short, would be the same ones who would bitch that its too long if you changed it.

This was adorable. I was afraid the animation might not be too great when I saw the wizard, but once he started exploding things into existence, I found there was more than enough eye candy.

The timing was great and snappy. A very cute idea with good execution.

Score: 8

"mmm"

submission: Glanzstoff

date: November 20, 2007

I love crazy trippy montages like this.

Especially when done with aphextwin beats.

Its also nice to see Flash 8 filters used to obscure things rather than enhance them.

Score: 10

"Argh you made a new cartoon and I didnt notice arr"

submission: A Few Sundays in October

date: November 20, 2007

It's been a while since you made something composed of little short films.
I suppose I should review each on their own merit;
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I didnt like the first one a whole lot. While I can and do respect the skill used to make it, not much was really there to feed my eyes. My ears yes, as the song was very nice, but not much really was there. No meat.
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The second one seems to me like an idea that could easily be expanded into a longer flash. The cardboard backround and white vehicles actually reminded me of another flash cartoon done entirely in cardboard called "Paper Sky" which was on Atomfilms and is on newgrounds now as well.
And its funny that it reminded me of that, because Paper Sky also used music from the movie Amelie which you used in......
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....the third one which was easily the best one of all. You used a different art style in this one, and overall it reminded me of Shel Silverstein. I also like the watercolor paint effect. Watercolors never get the respect that acrylic and oil paints do. And it was very freeform and very pleasant and nice. A good depiction of how a brainstorm makes one's thoughts jump from one thing to another, to another, to another. Also, you used those realistic splatters and coffee stains again which I recall from another short of yours. I always like how those look.

tl:dr, it was good. :)

Score: 8

"delicious satire"

submission: You Love This Movie

date: November 16, 2007

I didnt like how Boinky's mouth like....flopped when he talked.
But this is the sort of thing more people should make.

*insert long pretentious critique here*

and i'm spent
the illwillpress scenes along earned you a nice 5